I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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