He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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