mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
