angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Shame - the story of my life.
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