do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Randomize
