I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
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you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
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Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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