Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
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he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
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I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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