Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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