Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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