Texts From Last Night

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  (520): View more from Arizona

  i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.

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  (520): i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off. http://tfl.nu/yt3u
  Replies (10) Good night (2857) Bad night (635)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.

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  (706): oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out. http://tfl.nu/6a0y
  Replies (5) Good night (874) Bad night (2892)
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  (650): View more from California

  you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"

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  (650): you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks" http://tfl.nu/u0u9
  Replies (18) Good night (5825) Bad night (654)
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  (646): View more from New York

  in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life

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  (646): in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life http://tfl.nu/n6il
  Replies (24) Good night (1187) Bad night (4403)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed

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  (713): when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed http://tfl.nu/1ijl
  Replies (13) Good night (5264) Bad night (1407)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.

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  (609): and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience. http://tfl.nu/1o4v
  Replies (34) Good night (904) Bad night (5918)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me

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  (616): im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me http://tfl.nu/gxh6
  Replies (5) Good night (827) Bad night (2858)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives

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  (215): I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives http://tfl.nu/ehnp
  Replies (6) Good night (2059) Bad night (917)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.

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  (215): hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges. http://tfl.nu/xi1h
  Replies (3) Good night (1528) Bad night (1158)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.

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  (508): Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos. http://tfl.nu/qg1c
  Replies (7) Good night (1806) Bad night (605)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Jake bring pizza.

  (775): View more from Nevada

  JAKE BRING PIZZA.

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  (775): Jake bring pizza. (775): JAKE BRING PIZZA. http://tfl.nu/e6ij
  Replies (6) Good night (1898) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.

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  (973): We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas. http://tfl.nu/opmh
  Replies (5) Good night (1747) Bad night (482)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.

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  (870): Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants. http://tfl.nu/u5r1
  Replies (1) Good night (598) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..

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  (708): that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs.. http://tfl.nu/9ni1
  Replies (2) Good night (581) Bad night (306)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.

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  (757): Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand. http://tfl.nu/tvqn
  Replies (4) Good night (492) Bad night (646)

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