Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
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