I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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