If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
