Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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