OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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