Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
there is glitter all over my balls
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