I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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