I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
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Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
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The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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