We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
