There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
don't judge my taste in strippers
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Randomize
