please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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