Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
