Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
