It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
