Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Randomize
