Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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