doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
