I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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