This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
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