It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
