Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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