the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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