She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
