if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
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OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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