is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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