I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Randomize
