she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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