By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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