mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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