I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize