Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
40s are totally the cure
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
