yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
