I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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