for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize