Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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