Sry I called you an 8
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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