sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
