I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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