my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
