it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
We need a shit load of segways right now
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
